Crash Proof. Guaranteed.

To turn all the bad car drivers into a good car drivers, fix sharp spikes to the centre of their steering wheels, pointing at the centre of their chests.

This is guaranteed to improve the overall standard of driving. One way or another.

I believe I have discovered the cyclists equivalent.

While riding, I spotted two excellent Red Deer antlers, ideal for a piece of sculpture. But I had nowhere to carry them other than zipping them partially inside my jacket, tines nudging my ribs and neck.

As crashing would have resulted in a severed carotid artery, and quite possibly a kebabed kidney, I rode home sedately. My hands never once left the bars. See, it works.

The hinds are calving now, and the stags will have shed these antlers at the end of winter. There may be more to find.

Oh and the sculpture? That's a work in progress.

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